When the 1911 census of England and Wales was released a year early, it was great news for genealogists as for many, it could crack unsolved mysteries or knock down brick walls. I had relative ease finding most of my ancestors (those of whom were still living) in 1911, but there was one person who I initially could not find for the life of me — my great-great-grandmother, Ann Cummings Gray. I tried searching for every variation of her names I could think of, “Ann”, “Anne”, “Annie”, “Grey”, “Gray”, etc. and all combinations thereof. I found a couple of records that were close, but I was pretty sure none of them were correct.
The odd thing was that I had already found her husband, William Hedley Gray — my great-great-grandfather — living alone with their three children in Hirst near Ashington, Northumberland. William was listed as married, not widowed, with three children, so I assumed Ann must have been alive somewhere. I initially thought she could have been in hospital, perhaps having another child, but as far as I was aware, even hospital patients were included on the census, and there was no results there. I then read on the 1911 census website that there was the Suffragette movement at that time, so then considered the possibility that maybe she purposely stayed out all night. However, I read that most suffragettes didn’t include ANY female occupants of the house on the census, and as Ann’s daughters were both included on the census, I thought it was unlikely. After a few weeks searching, I decided to put it to one side, hoping to pick it up again at a later date with more success.
A few months later I came back to it, and decided to try and find when Ann died. Perhaps she had died before 1911 and William had just not listed himself as widowed. I eventually tracked down her death certificate — in 1959. Upon ordering the certificate, the informant was listed as a “G. Rickerby, daughter”. This was a surprise as firstly, I didn’t have any children down for Ann and William starting with G, nor did either of their other daughters marry a Mr Rickerby. There was only one Gray-Rickerby marriage in the BMD indexes, for a “Gladys J Gray”. Tracking down this birth revealed she was born in 1909, but this didn’t make sense as surely she would have been living with William in 1911. William also listed he only had 3 children, all of whom were living with him.
This was starting to get very confusing, so to confirm I had the correct person, I ordered Gladys’ birth certificate. Gladys Jane Gray’s parents were listed as Ann Cummings Gray (her maiden name was also Gray) and William Hedley Gray. So where was Gladys in 1911? Again, all searches turned up no results. I found the births of Gladys and her husband and managed to track down her son, who lived not far from me. Myself and another cousin who has been doing research met up with him and his family where the mystery started to come to light.
Gladys’ son lived with his mother and grandmother Ann as a child, and later saw Ann about once a year after he got married and moved down south. I was surprised to hear that he never knew of his grandfather (not even his name), nor had he heard of any of the William and Ann’s eldest three children, including my great-grandmother. Very soon it became apparent that William and Ann had separated fairly soon after the birth of my great-grandmother in 1901. Ann had then had her daughter Gladys out of wedlock, yet still put her husband (they never divorced) William’s name as the father on the birth certificate. Gladys’ son also told me that his mum had a brother that she always referred to as her half-brother, called Harry Stead Gray. If Harry and Gladys were half-siblings, then Ann must have have had Harry out of wedlock with another man. I was also told of the family legend was that Harry was the result of an extramarrital affair between Ann and William Thomas Stead, hence his middle name. Stead went down with the Titanic in 1912. I haven’t found any evidence that this legend is true yet (and I doubt I will), but who knows, maybe it was. Once again, on Harry’s birth certificate, William Hedley Gray was listed as the father.
I still hadn’t found Ann in 1911 by this point, and luckily I had a brainwave; I remembered you could search for an address in the 1911 census, not just by name. Harry was born in 1913, not long after the census was taken, so I decided to search for the address in Newcastle that he was born at. Upon seeing the record, I initially thought that I had once again been successful, as living at the address was an Annie Temple and her daughter Jane. Upon further examination however, I realised that I had found the correct people. The age and place of birth given for “Annie” matched that of Ann, as did her year of marriage. Her daughter “Jane” also matched the details of Gladys (her middle name was Jane). So why the surname Temple rather than Gray? The name did seem familiar to me and I soon remembered where it was from; Ann’s mother’s maiden name was Julia Temple. Ann was living under an assumed name, hiding from her past! Interestingly Ann also lists that she only has 1 child, not 4. She was also living with a married man who was listed as a “lodger”. Maybe he wasn’t just a lodger — I was later told by a cousin that William and the children left through one door, whilst Ann left through another with “her fancy man on her arm”. Gladys’ son remembered his mum recalling having a lot of “uncles” around as a young girl.
The subject of illegitimacy and extramarrital affairs would have been shameful and embarrasing generations ago, certainly skeletons in the closet. However, it’s not so much of an taboo subject nowadays (not that I am condoning infidelity in any way). I personally think these events made for challenging research and definitely make good story telling.
Ann died in Newcastle in 1959 and is buried at St John’s Cemetery in Elswick, Newcastle. There is no headstone, but there is also six (unrelated) infants buried in the same plot. The family couldn’t afford to buy the plot so she was put in an unmarked grave, but at least the exact plot location is known. Maybe one day we will get a headstone for Ann — she might not have been a great wife or mother, but she has certainly been the subject of conversation!
I personally don’t think that Ann’s eldest three children even knew the existence of their two younger half-siblings, or vice versa. And I doubt that they eldest three saw their mother again after she left their father. My grandmother’s sister talked about meeting William, but there was never any mention of their grandmother, just the opposite of Gladys’ son. An interesting, yet sad tale.